Being a romantic sucks. Or at least, being me and being a romantic sucks.
I'm not a romantic in the sense that I like flowers and chocolates and watching Jennifer Aniston movies. I like stories without happy endings, things that should be good but are destructive instead and I like sadness. I'm not particulary morbid, at least not in the blood and gore sense. More in the emotional sense. It's difficult to explain because I don't think a lot of people would understand but sometimes I need to listen to sad music and read books that aren't uplifting at all. I'm a bit self destructive I guess. I'd rather have a great love that ruins me than be ordinary. I want to live a normal life but I want to make it mean something and to me that means having a love like something out of a movie. But I don't kid myself, if something like that is in the cards for me it almost certainly won't have a happy ending.